— You change your cheap replica watches like you change your shirt. You match your timepieces to your appointments. You find the idea of not wearing one unthinkable. Your motto? A fake Rolex watch for every occasion.
6 am – The alarm rings. It’s strident, shrill. No option but to switch it off. Open one eye, jump out of bed, head for the bathroom. Shower, perfume, cream, choose your clothes, makeup, jewelry, watch. Every gesture is precise, the mechanics well-oiled. This day is off to a perfect start. On your wrist sits a classic two-tone watch matched with a new bi-material strap: a Linea Dark Chocolate by Baume& Mercier. Reassuring and sweet, like the calm before the storm …
7 am – Time to wake up the little monsters. Junior 1 is as floppy as a mattress without springs. Junior 2 bounds out of his bedroom like a shaggy Zebulon, while Junior 3 greets you with yells even more piercing than the ringing of your alarm. With a nervous breakdown threatening, a little dose of comfort is called for. Phew! A quick glance at your Rendez-Vous Date watch by Jaeger-LeCoultre is enough to make you feel better. It’s already time to drop Juniors 1, 2 and 3 at school. You’re definitely not the Desperate Housewives type.
10 am – Ultra-important meeting in room 25 with a group of Chinese salespeople who have come to learn a bit more about the standards of watchmaking elegance and the various combinations of materials. A vast subject… Rather than take intensive mandarin classes, you prefer leading by example and proudly display your GraffStar Icon Automatic – by Graff naturally. Judging from their smiles, you understand that they are already over the moon about its pink ceramic case, mother-of-pearl dial and its dual-time display. Abracadabra… it’s a wrap.
Noon – Your good friend Hortense is already 20 minutes late for the lunch that you have been putting off for months due to: Junior 3 being sick/a training course on a brand-new hyper-innovative ultra-thin movement / holidays in Valais at your mother-in-law’s /a meeting with Junior 1’s French teacher. Hortense is really pushing it now… When she arrives at last, you suggest she buys a cheap Rolex replica watches to help her be on time. Why not your most recent crush, a Horsebit model by Gucci?
2.10 pm – It almost left without you you. But you run really fast wearing your stilettos. Very fast… Usain Bolt in high heels? Minus the biceps, plus long hair, as well as an ever-spinning seconds hand in your head in order to catch up with time gone mad… Once in the train, you let yourself be sped to Paris. Freeze the image: more than ever, you feel like the heroine of your life and the most elegant of your super powers is a watch: the Carrera Lady 28mm Calibre 9 automatic. Thanks TAG Heuer!
5.30 pm – Harry – your English chauffeur whose incredible punctuality has always made you think he could have been born in Switzerland, in the Vallée de Joux, as the great-great grandson of a famous watchmaker – is already waiting for you when your stilettos hit the platform. Madame has a meeting in the 1st arrondissement? In half an hour? Would Madame kindly fasten her seat belt!? Wedged in the back of Harry’s powerful car, you warn your good friend Marguerite who kindly invited you to the Hermès Spring-Summer fashion show that you will be arriving any minute. On a front-row seat, thank you very much! You keep a low profile and discreetly reveal your new/tiny/adorable Faubourg Swiss replica watches by Hermès. You are in line to win a first prize for elegance.
7 pm – Driiiing… A frantic phone call from your super babysitter who’s on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Junior 3 is running a temperature of 39.5°C! Junior 1 still isn’t back from his friend’s apartment. And as for Junior 3, he still hasn’t grasped the fact that your apartment is not a football field! You need a serious upper. A little gentleness, luxury, calm and voluptuousness… Inhale, exhale, inhale… think of the Coué method… Look at your watch. It’s a Boucheron Reflet model. Its vintage elegance mesmerizes you. Everything is fine. It truly is absolutely fine…
9 pm – A rendezvous with a man – your own – in a chic restaurant. Soft pile carpet, muted lights, starred chef in the kitchen… the evening menu looks tasty. The father of Juniors 1, 2 and 3 has also taken the train to join you and has a big piece of news for you – or rather a declaration, a gift to celebrate your 20 years together. Close your eyes, open them… no, you aren’t dreaming. Diamonds, grey mother-of-pearl… it really is a Sublime Timepiece by Harry Winston. You are over the moon and so is your man!
5.30 am – Cheeks flushed with pleasure, you dance wildly on the floor of a legendary club. For just a few hours you forget Junior 3 and his inoffensive little children’s disease, the Asian salespeople, Harry and his big car, Hortense and her pathological tardiness. Suddenly it is you that is overcome by fever. On your left wrist, is a de GRISOGONO Allegra watch in pink gold set with emeralds designed by the king of partying himself, Fawaz Gruosi. On your right wrist, is a Jacob & Co Brilliant Skeleton Jewelry Swiss cheap Rolex watch. Watchmaking, its codes, its fashions, its mechanics – none of it holds any secrets for you and that is abundantly clear. With your timepieces clasped firmly to your wrists, the passing hours tick delectably by. Where can one buy a ticket for the next 24 hours?